I can feel the depression trying to take hold of me, I am trying to hold it back, There is no reason for the depression to be making an appearance except for the problems with the balance of biochemicals within my brain. There is also the issue of self-sabotage due to the fact that as I have had depression for so long I have forgotten what it was like not to have it, as a result a part of my mind is content with the current situation and tries to keep me in the same place, along with the fact that I believe that I don't deserve to be either well or happy.
The insomnia probably isn't helping , but despite the reduced sleep I have still got up and done several jobs today including making marmalade. Also managed to get out for a short walk, though not on my own, as I know if I leave it for too long it becomes harder to walk out through the front door.
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