Saturday, 21 September 2013

Off again

I'm going downhill fast once again, I got myself into a bit of a state over meeting someone new, causing myself a migraine. That was a week ago, and added with other things going on that for some reason I refuse to share I'm in a real state.

I have had to push myself to get anything done this week, as all I want to do is hide, not helped by having a throat infection and an abscess on my gum.

I am going through another bout of why am I bothering, my fears about my future have increased so much that when I think about the future I have been physically sick. I haven't gone don't the why me route, its not fair, instead my head is filled with anxiety and panic. I have tried thinking about other things, trying to distract myself but nothing has worked. I know that I have felt like this before and recovered but there is always the fear that one time I won't.

Life has become too much, overwhelming, I no longer know where to turn, it feels like I'm totally alone.






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